Blog: IQTHENUMBER1GOON on LiveVideo.com

Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 21
Sign: Aquarius
City: EAST NEW MARKET, MARYLAND
State: Maryland
Country:

United States

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2009

May

an impending end...how it really is.

February

2008

TUESDAY, MAY 26, 2009 (8:24 AM)

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an impending end...how it really is.

(I'm feeling depressed)

I am going through a lot right now, can’t even begin to delve into it all. I know I’m mentally not in a good place. I’m questioning my every action and feeling torn on my own set of ethics and values. Hope seems lost yet I manage to pull off the effortless front of happiness daily. Is it not noticed? Of course it isn’t, I have excelled in propelling a smile and mustering laughs to mask the pain and anguish of my true emotions. As each day passes the feeling of overwhelming apathy swarms me like an uncontrollable beast. Every thought of bliss is exterminated by the bittersweet over tone of self loathing. Although conducting myself in a manner to appease those who’s opinions I value, I find myself sacrificing my only chance at changing my outlook. There was a time were letting go seemed like much more of an event and issue then it does now. I have come to terms that there is a time for everyone to come and go. The problem is when I try to decide whether staying is worth the agony and heartache that is endured by remaining. My issue lies in the fact that my happiness is a void that I fill with fictional smiles and laughs. The achievement of any form of genuine happiness has been bitterly taken from me long ago. I used to feel that death was waiting for me, now I feel like I’m waiting for death. One can only give so much before all there resources are drained. As I begin to accept what is forth coming. I am slowly being more at peace with my self and my soul. I feel cleansed and am awaiting the for the stroke of finality to come. Darkness isn’t a wicked thing, it is the end to a wicked thing.

Category: Life

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Posted May 26, 09 by dxegrl99 (

)
goon...you have touched so many people and you are true in what you do! you have accomplished alot and mastered alot! you have gotten alot further in life than other people your age. you are a true person and you care about those close to you! im here for you no matter what you do! if you need someone to talk to just hit me up! you just gotta keep the faith. i send you much love and many hugz! love ya, dixie

Posted May 26, 09 by BarBrawllin
Your truely one of the realest people i have met on here,your a funny guy,even if it is just a mask covering something else,its a fuckin talent in itself,your musicly and lyricly gifted and dont take bulshit from nobody and tell it like it is,i respect you alot for that.

I hope u realise(if u dont already know) what it is that truely makes you happy in this world and grab it,the happyness might be sitting right under your nose and u just dont realise it yet?Life is what you make it,and all i know is you make it better for alot of people,that i have no doubt of,your a survivor and cant wait to see you pull through this dark steamy pile of shit in this burrito we call life.

Keep ur head up man,your a fucking warrior!

Posted May 26, 09 by therogue (

)
Goon,firstly ..i would like to say,at some point in our lifes,we come to the crossroads where we need to look into your selfs and decide what direction we want to go in life,and i will always be there to support you no matter what it is!

your a great guy,even when your not on lv, we all have two personnalities when we are on here,and no matter what you do,your the goon i know,on and off lv,your a great artist and arwe a great person in hole.

some times we all go thrue a dark tunnel,but remember there is a light at each of the tunnels,and i be standing half way with a light so you dont get lost my friend!

respeckt