Blog: RayBlanco on LiveVideo.com

Gender: Male
Age: 26
Sign: Leo
City: CA
State: California
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We looked a tornado in the eye... an...
so. why not podcast?
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but what does it mean?
8 days
i wanna be your lover

MONDAY, JUNE 16, 2008 (12:27 PM)

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i wanna be your lover

(I'm feeling awake)

yeah-- prince is on as i decided to write this-- lets see where it goes---

i just got home from an exciting evening at a little place we have come to know as "the wasko facility"

lets just say it had something to do with poker, rock band, mexican food and me winning some money.

does anyone recall the scene from fight club.... ed norton is describing his perfect ikea home---- and BAMMMMM it blows to smithereeeeensss..

i come home from an evening out.
if i were to light a match---or im guessing rb t sticks together just right--- there was enough gas in my house to blow it to kingdom come---- apparantly mystery room mate guy cooked something up and decided to leave the gas form the stove running--- i wouldnt be suprised if he was dead from the fumes--- but im to annoyed to even check--- i opened up all the doors and windows---its fricken freezing----- and i still have a head ache...

soooo
im realizing something in my life---i think on my solo car ride home alone--hence==solo----
do i care to share it with you right now--- no- probably not--- do you even wanna know----probably not---- its just messed up little thoughts that go on in my head and i have no control over--- but every day is another piece to my life puzzle--- i think i almost have the border complete----

i have the best song in my brain-----
the words--- though not even written----- are pretty intense---
i do not believe there is a song written that capsulates the emotions in my little crazy brain at this moment---
however--- time is runing out just came on-----
i refuse to surrender

<<<<ou say I'm looking really bad, you say I'm looking really sick
And I don't even care I never really did
So when push comes to shove and I slap you in the face
Just remember one thing...

When its time to fill the void my whole life has been destroyed
And everyone around me says my time is running out
I refuse to surrender, I refuse to surrender

So when I'm out of control and I'm out of my mind
Just remember one thing, I think I'm just fine
So catch me when I fall, I won't remember anything at all
So catch me when i fall...

When its time to fill the void my whole life has been destroyed
and everyone around me says my time is running out
I refuse to surrender, i refuse to surrender

Woaho woaho yeah yeah woaho woaho yeah yeah

When its time to fill the void my whole life has been destroyed
and everyone around me says my time is running out
When its time to fill the void my whole life has been destroyed
and everyone around me says my time is running out
I refuse to surrender i refuse to surrender i refuse surrender
I refuse to surrender >>>

pretty appropriate...

who wants to go to a kings game?

snowboarding? i quit snowboarding in 1999 when i realized--it i fell and broke my arm or wrist--my career would be pretty bummed----- but i wanna go---so--- im gonna..

please please please--- james brown-- yeah---- pretty bad ass---

Please, please, please, please me (You don't have to go)
Baby please, baby please, please me (You don't have to go)
Baby please, baby please don't go (You don't have to go)
Don't go, I said baby, don't baby
I love you so (You don't have to go)

Baby, you know you broke my heart when you went away (You don't have to go)
I said, I said, I said I'll see you some other day (You don't have to go)
I said, baby, baby, please, don't go (You don't have to go)
Don't go, no baby, no baby
I love you so (You don't have to go)

Take this pain from my heart

Baby, let me take you by the hand (You don't have to go)
Baby, baby let me, let me be your lover man (You don't have to go)
Baby please, baby please don't go (You don't have to go)
Don't go, I said baby, don't baby
I love you so (You don't have to go)

Please, please, please, please me (You don't have to go)
Baby please, baby please, please me (You don't have to go)
Baby please, baby please don't go (You don't have to go)
Don't go, I said baby, don't baby
I love you so (You don't have to go)

Please please me

whats my problem?

is life supposed to have answers?

or just questions....
whoa--- very weird----
i song called questions just came on--by my old band home town hero----and i oddly enough am wearing the sweatshirt---- i have never worn it ever before--- :) weird---

anyways--- i think i just needed to write some stuff ----not that any of this makes sense---but it makes me feel better----- and thats what counts---

im gonna go ahead and go downstairs and light a match now---- if i live--- im gonna bring fight club upstairs and watch it--- i intend on seeing the sunrise for the 4th night/ morning in a row---

youre a pirate for a day
you took my life away
look me in the face
burning my brigade
i need more then i can say
a diamond was your need
youll burn eternally
its over then youll see
running ot the door
i gave everything but you wanted more

gona let you fall on your face
you prooved to be a disgrace
i never felt so good
knowing that i should
but ill be knocking on your door

something happened in my head i lost my sense of dread
the thing that scared me most in life was living, now im dead.

baby ---you know i tried---
thats why i still ask why...
in between my sobs and sighs
i cry
suicide.

and then this came on after i posted my bulletin..

We're playing those mind games together
Pushing the barriers, planting seeds
Playing the mind guerrilla
Chanting the mantra, peace on earth
We all been playing those mind games forever
Some kinda druid dudes lifting the veil
Doing the mind guerrilla
Some call it magic, the search for the grail

Love is the answer and you know that for sure
Love is a flower, you got to let it, you got to let it grow

So keep on playing those mind games together
Faith in the future, outta the now
You just can't beat on those mind guerrillas
Absolute elsewhere in the stones of your mind
Yeah we're playing those mind games forever
Projecting our images in space and in time

Yes is the answer and you know that for sure
Yes is surrender, you got to let it, you got to let it go

So keep on playing those mind games together
Doing the ritual dance in the sun
Millions of mind guerrillas
Putting their soul power to the karmic wheel
Keep on playing those mind games forever
Raising the spirit of peace and love

Love...
(I want you to make love, not war, I know you've heard it before)

--me personally---- i just want to take a deep breathe-- you know--one of those breathes when everything is ok in your soul--- in you rmind-- in your life--- you take a breathe and you are at ease--- i havent had one of those in months---
and then maybe---- just maybe--- i will sleep
forever.

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