At this point I am not only physical tired but, mentally tired.  I thought maybe it was the pain perventing me from sleeping but, I am thinking that the stress in my life is not only not letting me sleep but, causing my physical problems also.

I normally can't take things lightly.  I am so uptight it reflects in my muscles.  So not only I have a 5 year old injury but, I also have a curved spine right in my neck for holding my muscles so tight.  I think I was even a worryer as a child.  

My dad was a abusive drunk mostly to my mom. Even though I just started to remember the things he did to my mom and us (sister and I).  My mother is a fighter so she always fought back when my dad started on his abusive drunken rampage.  But, since I was really young I would try to stop the fighting.  In result my father would abuse me because, I was not going let him hurt her.  

Sometimes, I would lay in my bed hearing them fight clinging my fist to the point I would dig my fingers into my palms.  In resulting tightening my muscles and I clunged my jaw.  

So now at 40 I still suffer from the results of my fathers abuse even though he is been gone now for 6 years.  

I started Physical Therapy this week and BOY I hurt...Really hurt.  I guess using muscles I normally don't use is throwing a fit.  So that made me go to the doctor yesterday and got some valium and Percocet...I took the Percocet when I got home and decide to take the valium at bedtime.  Well the Vailum didn't even make me sleepy and it didn't relax me.  

I will not take the meds when my children are home with just me and them.  So I wait for my husband to come home so I don't have to worry about not taking care of my children the way I need too.   So I take a few advils...

I need to stay awake and dozing off is not the answer...this is what I am strugging with right now.  LOL

Well I am running out of thought...Blog to ya later..

Who else thinks Mike Rowe is HAWT??? I know Wendy does...hehehe
Love ya Wendy ;p~~~