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Should you buy that girl a drink???
(I'm feeling contemplative)
Anyone who knows me, and has gone out with me knows that I will throw in my money, or card without a question (at times against your will)... I never liked talking to people I had no interest in JUST for a drink (it's alcohol, not a new liver, haha)... And, if someone buys me a drink, I feel ZERO obligation to continue to converse with them if I am not captivated by them... I have been known to tell a guy upon being offered a drink, that I will not continue talking to him after, so if it is his intention, I am sorry, but don't waste money... I am not rude about it, just honest... There have been days where we make it into a game (sorry boys, but it's funny to us...)... Even on those days, this all holds true... I give you an OFFICIAL answer... This was not too "in depth" at all... So, I will be happy to get deeper into this subject if you have more questions... Original question, with my response following... Enjoy...
Okay, so... The question was:
"So Karyn you seem like an astute young woman I got a question for you hah. Lets say your at a bar and a girl comes up to you and ask you to buy her a drink. You don't know her at all but she asks you anyway. Shes very attractive but you don't buy strangers a drink esp when you know their only trying to get a free drink out of it. So this person gets mad that you wont buy them a drink even though their good looking, good move or bad?"
My response:
Karyn Harbey
4:33pm Jan 3rd
If you said "no" to me... ESPECIALLY if I were drunk... I would not like you, and not talk to you...
If you said "yes" to me... Regardless, if I wasn't interested, I wouldn't continue a conversation... (Most girls will, but you can sort of tell, depending on how drunk you are, that they are TRYING to "get away" from the conversation... You can typically tell this more factually by giving her and "out" of some sort...)
If you said yes to me... And, I WAS interested... I would keep talking to you, and at some point I would give you my number if you asked, even if I wandered off (I do that A LOT)...
So, I mean, if you think she's hott, it's up to you... Offering to buy a drink is better, so if she's asked you... She thinks you look like a sucker, or she's wasted... (or both)
But, if you notice, even if I am drunk, sober, whatever... Saying "No" to a drink for me (if I am demanding them, I am drunk), I won't even talk to you if I like you... I take it as a direct insult (Saying no at any time, is like saying, "You are not hott enough for me to bend my rules, and I couldn't care less if I do not speak to you again!" Alcohol is involved, so remember, rationality is minimal here... Even for the MOST logical, and fact obsessed type of girl, like me... EVERY girl wants to be THE exception in your life... She wants to be treated outside of the "rules" to you... That is another subject entirely though... A topic all its own...)
So, it's a gamble... On one hand, buying the drink allows you to see if she's interested in you, or just wants a free drink... Not buying the drink, many times the girl takes it as you not really liking her, but maybe just wanting to hook up with her... If she's drunk... She believes that you buying, or not buying her drinks, is directly connected with how much you like her...
I ALMOST forgot... If you like her, or even if you're only trying to get laid... DO NOT exclude her friend... If you opt to buy this girl a drink, do not refer directly to her friend (only because if she is drunk enough, she and her friend will think you might be a creep and just trying to sleep with whichever of them you can... Even if you are... DO it this way, and you'll have a better chance...), ask the girl you are buying the drink for if her friend wants one as well... If you wind up dating, that friend will take your side more often... If you wind up sleeping together, that girl will encourage it more... If you all wind up wasted and she passes out, and they are competitive whore-bags... THAT girl will sleep with you instead (please wear protection, and still get tested after that)... If her friend is a guy... Well, you know the drill... It's one of the reasons my guy friends love going out with me... ;P
I might have to post this as a "rule of thumb" for guys...
This is what I do, by the way... What I wish I could get paid for... I write, I advise... I want to write and advice/opinion column... I have ZERO training, and only personal experience... But, it is my passion!
Did I answer your question?
(This has additional information originally not included in my response)
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